A Sliver of Me: Me Sad!!!

Friday, September 26, 2008

Me Sad!!!

I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline!!

I got a freakin' outsourced call center in Pakistan

I told them I was suicidal

They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

4 comments:

Cheri said...: *snort* How late did you stay up thinking of that one? Now I'm resisting the urge to wake hubby up....; Friday, September 26, 2008
Anonymous said...: Wish I could see the pix. Me sad now, wink!; Friday, September 26, 2008
Carin said...: I'm still laughing over this one.; Saturday, September 27, 2008
Auntie M said...: Good one!!; Saturday, September 27, 2008

Quotes

"Character is determined by what you accomplish when the excitement is gone."

"I dream of a better tomorrow...where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned."

“Unless you are calling me pudding, stop saying it!"

"Creative people must be stopped!"

"Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination"

"No, is just the noise you hear before yes"

"There is a certain amount of creativity in destruction."

"Although fate presents the circumstances, how you react depends on your character."

"Reset Switches are Day Spas for electronic devices."

"Anything that is easily obtained is not worth having." Me

"An optimist is a person who sees a green light everywhere; while a pessimist sees only the red stop light. The truly wise person is color blind." - Dr Albert Schweitzer

"Someday your prince charming will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is to stubborn to ask for directions."

"When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition until death do them part." - G.B. Shaw

"The greatest pain that comes from love is loving someone you can never have."

"The spaces between your fingers were created so that another's could fill them in."

"Always look at what you have left. Never look at what you have lost" - Robert H Schuller

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing." - Abraham Lincoln

"Winter must be cold for those who have no warm memories..."

"Don't you ever get nervous about forever?"

"Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it." - Lou Holtz

"Any dern fool can be young, it takes guts to get old."

"The trouble ain't that there are too many fools, but that the lighting ain't distributed right."

"How is this going to work if you don't do what I say?"

“In fighting and in everyday life you should be determined though calm. Meet the situation without tenseness yet not recklessly, your spirit settled yet unbiased. An elevated spirit is weak and a low spirit is weak. Do not let the enemy see your spirit.”- Miyamoto Musashi

"We prepare, so we don't end up at the Super Dome"

"If you can see the big picture, you are not concentrating on the front sight post."

"SHORT & FAT- 'It's a Choice Not a Drunken Mistake'"

"Amateurs train until they get it right; Professionals train until they can't get it wrong."

"Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance!"

"The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed; regardless which side they are fighting for"

"Adversity introduces us to ourselves"

"Death smiles at all of us; all we can do is smile back"

"Do not confuse enthusiasm for capability"

"My tone is a direct reflection of your attitude."

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please."

"All I did was break her eggs and bruise her artichoke hearts"

"Of all the things of my past, I think I miss my sanity the most."

"Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness." Sigmund Freud

"Bobby got the vouch...Game over dudes."

"Watching you walk out of my life does not make me bitter or cynical about love. But rather makes me realize that if I wanted so much to be with the wrong person how beautiful it will be when the right one comes along."

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"Covetness ends with the..."
*** APPLAUSE ***
Thank you, Thank you all very much; I will be here all week.

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Your computer has played a VERY evil trick and you; as a result you have stumbled upon my blog. A blog that has an interesting collection of sarcasm, satire, inspiration, humor, politics, criticism, and skeptical constructive relationship commentary. Stop back often, stay awhile, check out the archived posts and leave as many comments as you would like. For those that prefer to lurk, you are welcome to lurk around as much as you would like, just don't let it develop into full blown stalking.

The contributor to this blog are not responsible for the readers lost sleep or complications from time spent reading here. If you experience sudden onset of emotion, sleepless nights or any strange new desires you might consider contacting you physician. Known side effects include; anxiety, depression, hyper-concentration, hypo-concentration, emotion outburst and red eyes. Any relationship advice offered up is for scientific purpose only and the reader must take into advisement that the author has never managed to maintain a relationship past six months.

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Friday, September 26, 2008

Me Sad!!!

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